Guilty Pleasures: Flash Gordon

Flash! A-ah! Savior of the universe!

Come on, sing it with me!

Flash! A-ah! He’ll save every one of us!

I know you know it. Are you too embarrassed to sing along? I’m not. I love Flash Gordon. Yes, it’s cheesy. Yes, the dialogue is a bit dodgy and so is the acting. And it’s camp as hell. But you know what? That’s what makes it so much fun!

If you’re not familiar with the 1980 movie (and really, if you’re not, where have you been for the last 30 years?) it’s an adaptation of the 30s serials which were themselves an adaptation of the comic strip by Alex Raymond. In the movie, Flash is a quarterback for the New York Jets who winds up going into outer space with journalist Dale Arden and mad scientist Hans Zarkov in an attempt to stop the Earth from being destroyed by unknown forces from beyond the solar system. They wind up on Mongo, prisoners of Ming the Merciless. Ming has Zarkov sent to be brainwashed, plans to marry Dale and sentences Flash to death. Of course, he doesn’t stay dead (thanks to handy plot devices) or the movie would be half an hour long.

After being revived by Ming’s daughter, Princess Aura, he sets about gathering support to fight against Ming. The princes of the different factions, once kings in their own right before they were subjugated, are constantly at war with each other. Ming knows that if he can keep them jockeying for his favor, they won’t be able to band together and overthrow him. By testing his mettle against the princes, Flash becomes a unifying force, allowing for Ming’s downfall and saving Earth before Ming’s annihilation plan is complete.

Despite the fact that it’s camp as all get out and knowingly silly (How does Flash fight Ming’s guards when he first gets to Mongo? Impromptu football game, of course!) Flash Gordon still managed to attract some huge names. Topol, Brian Blessed, Peter Wyngarde…if you don’t know them, look them up. Seriously. And then there’s Max Von Sydow. His Ming is not just evil, he’s deliciously evil. And he chews the scenery like he’s addicted to plaster. And once you take out the guys who were famous in 1980, there’s still loads of people who became famous later or had blink-and-you’ll-miss-them roles, like Timothy Dalton, Richard O’Brien (famous to Rocky Horror fans), Robbie Coltrane and Deep Roy.

And, try as you might, you can’t deny the soundtrack by Queen. Sure, I’m a big fan of Queen so I’m biased, but I defy you to think of a band better suited to a over-the-top movie like Flash Gordon than a band with over-the-top guitars and a larger than life singer like Freddie Mercury. (Much as I loved Freddie and thought it was awesome when he wore the Flash shirt, Sam Jones looked WAY better in it!) “Flash’s Theme” is an iconic rock anthem. So is the less well known “The Hero” that runs over the closing credits. To be honest, the rest of the album doesn’t work very well without the movie to go along with it, but it’s a solid piece of work.

I recently rented the “Saviour of the Universe Edition” of Flash Gordon and I really enjoyed Alex Ross’ tribute feature. He also did the cover painting for the DVD. I really love his artwork and it’s clear that HE really loves the movie. Sadly, the Brian Blessed commentary that’s on the European silver anniversary DVD is not here. I’d love to see that. I’ve heard interviews with him before and he seems like a genuinely lovely man WHO REALLY DOES SPEAK IN ALL CAPS.

If you haven’t ever seen Flash Gordon, you really should check it out. Don’t go in expecting a riveting plot or awesome special effects. Think the “Batman” TV show, not The Dark Knight. Not even the Tim Burton Batman. Go in with the thought to see it in the spirit it was intended, a romping tribute to the cheesy serials from back in the day and you will love it. If you have seen it, but haven’t seen it in a while, check it out again and see if you don’t still remember it fondly.